I’ve been nudged by something to make...these things...these things that want to be made.
It’s a call from something that lives above the clouds where the air is cold and swirly. And it’s been calling since the day I was born.
But before I could get here, I muddied through decades of shit, thanks to the heavy hand of anger, depression, and self-loathing. Mercifully, I finally found meditation. And once my mind was allowed to breathe, I could see my life was ruled by fear.
No longer in fight-or-flight mode, I set out to address some of the biggest oh-my-god-it's-the-end-of-the-world-!-!-!-! triggers I had. Even my fear of roaches? Yep. Held a giant Madagascar Hissing Cockroach for a full minute, looked it right in the eye, and said, "Huh. You're pretty strong, bug. But hey, I'm way stronger."
After much work (and washing of hands), I felt good enough to ask for signs. Signs that the strong connection to Spirit I'd always sensed was there was, in fact, right in front of my nose.
So! One day at the beach, I asked.
I felt a shift roll in from the ocean and as I walked back to my car, I saw a perfectly preserved Pelican feather on the path ahead. I noticed the wind shook the sides, but it stayed planted on the sand as I walked up to claim the thing I'd always wanted—connection. This was my sign. And it was on, baby!
Like a snake, I shed skin after skin after skin. With every transmutation, my connection to Spirit grew exponentially.
Along the way, I visited several psychics and intuitive healers who said I had shamanic gifts. No, I’m not a shaman, shamans are Peruvian. But the term “shamanic” suggests gifts from Spirit. It can mean teacher, healer, and—the one that finally helped me know what flavor I am—tool maker.
That’s me. Tool maker. I make objects infused with messages from Spirit that act as tools.
Tools that help people feel calm. Get inspired. Realize they are loved, special, captains of their ships, unicorns, more-powerful-than-you-know-so-straighten-your-spine-and-take-a-deep-breath-because-you’re-as-tall-as-a-Sequoia-honey-you-got-this!
So there it is: I honor the tool-making call by getting out of the way to make the things. The things called Quiet Seeds. Hashtag-Made-In-Reverence-TM-R-ball.